Amid the Holly Jolly Folly,
It’s a Blue Christmas

Pay no attention to the green of Christmas trees and wreaths. Forget the red poinsettias. Don’t be dazzled by the twinkling white lights. The color of Christmas for many is blue.

            The frenetic rush of each person trying to find that perfect gift for every significant individual in his or her life all at once can be downright depressing for any of us. But for many, the busy-ness of the season is a reminder of what they have lost. For others, it is a reminder of what they have never had. Far from that most wonderful time, Christmas can be the most miserable time of the year.

            Christmas is a tough time for those who are grieving. That first, or for some even the twenty first, Christmas without your husband or wife or child is nearly unendurable. Everyone else is trying to put a jolly face on the season and you are left alone. Or if busy, you are still left without the one person who made Christmas joyful.

            For others, they have never found that love of their lives to bring light to the long winter of discontent. Christmas is just yet another reminder of loneliness. There are many reasons why this Christmas will be blue.

             Yet, Christmas, at its heart, was not supposed to be about buying gifts, sharing kisses under the mistletoe, or even gathering with family. Christmas was meant to be a celebration of the coming of God in the flesh, in the birth of Jesus. Yet, even that first Christmas was blue.

Misery loves company. Misery even loves miserable company, someone who can share the blues rather than always trying to put on a happy face. The holy family of Mary, Joseph and Jesus could have been the most miserable of company. They were forced by the oppressive rule of Rome into a long walk to Bethlehem. We put Mary on donkey in every Christmas picture, but the Bible doesn’t mention her riding one to Bethlehem.

Then the final indignity; she had to give birth in a stable, surrounded by the smell and noise of the livestock, with no mother, or aunt, or sister to help her through it.

Yet, there was that one notable bright spot in her Christmas—she gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Then everything changed. They went from two of a kind, to a full house, or stable anyway. First came the shepherds, their faces glowing from an angelic encounter. Later would come the wise men with their gifts. Then another case of the blues with Herod turning violent and the little family fleeing south as the murderous king sent his troops to slay the children of the City of David.

The Christmas story is not a happy tale. It is a story of darkness, with one amazingly bright spot; the silver lining to the deep darkness at the base of a towering thunderhead. But we make the story of that first coming of Jesus so Christmas Card clean that we don’t see the sadness of a young couple separated from family and friends, left on their own to deal with the impending birth.

But the whole story of Christmas only has power when we recall the darkness. That is why early Christians looking to baptize the Roman feast of Saturnalia with new meaning found it perfect for celebrating Jesus’ birth. Saturnalia came at the shortest day of the year. Celebrating Jesus’ birth was already the story of light coming into darkness and so it was a natural match.

If you are reading still, it may be that you are the one trying to suffer through a blue Christmas. Whether you lost the love of your life or have yet to find him or her, this is a season with an important piece missing. I don’t intend to tell you to make sure to remember Jesus and all your blues will be banished. That wouldn’t make any sense to a faith that remembers the mourning of the other mothers of Bethlehem who lost their children to Herod, even as Jesus was spirited away. Or to a Christianity that has Jesus crying from the cross “My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?” We can be nourished by our faith even in the dark times when we don’t feel happy.

It would be better to acknowledge the darkness of Christmas. But rather than giving yourself fully to the pity party of singing the blues alone, try gathering with others. Don’t worry that they won’t understand the pain you feel. Just get yourself out and go to church this Christmas season. Listen to the story with new ears. Notice how it is not a story of light alone, but of darkness that could not overcome the light.

Let others sing the joyful carols for you. But listen for their truest meaning, that even in the darkness God was and is present. For it is in the darkness of Christmas that its true blue meaning comes through. Christmas is about hope. No one can receive the gift of hope as fully as someone who is feeling its loss.

The one who came in a manger that dark night is present still even in the bluest of Christmases. And by the power of the Holy Spirit he is within you bringing that power of our loving Father to sustain you through the longest of nights.

You might not leave a Christmas Eve service with a smile on your face and a song in your heart. You might go even home with a heart ache. But if you let the Christmas story seep into your bones, you will at least know more fully that you are never alone for God is with you, especially on a blue Christmas.

(The Rev. Frank Logue is pastor of King of Peace Episcopal Church in Kingsland.)

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